Thursday, April 29, 2010

Unwell!!!

"Hello...(hello...hello...),
Is anybody in there?
Just nod if you can hear me
Is there anyone home?

Come on
Now
I hear you're feeling down
I can ease your pain
Get you on your feet again

Relax
I'll need some information first
Just the basic facts
Can you show me where it hurts?"

Huh...how wrong are you. Mr. Waters and Mr. Gilmour!

No...I have not become Comfortably Numb...on the contrary, its very uncomfortable...

How long has it been? Probably 4 days since I have slept...I can gauge by the intensity of the dark circles forming under my eyes...even my superficial pair of lenses fails to veil the sleeplessness...It hadn't dawned upon me till evening until my chief called me in and asked me whether I was doing fine...hell, he even asked me to visit the hospital...I smirked and answered with my usual nonchalance towards his superfluous concern..."koi chakkar nahi (as in to mean its ok)" and thought to myself...its been ages since I last visited a doc...5 years perhaps (touch wood)... not that I wish to schedule an appointment with 'em any time before I am on my death bed...

But yes, I called it an early evening today and came back to my den...just to contemplate on my state of being...this seeming disorder that is slowly but surely percolating into my veins...

No, its not the work - neither the quality nor quantity that is bogging me down...and it never will because its just not in my nature anymore to be pegged down by menial things like these...
Not to sound arrogant, I am well aware that being smarter and more hardworking than most people, has its own disadvantages...people around you wish to take the liberty to pass on some more of it to you every single time thinking that I am oblivious to what is happening...FYI...I do your work so that you can go home early and enjoy the nice little evening with your family...but certain things in life will always remain thankless...and that's the way it is...

Am I somewhere off my usual routine?...nops...same old eating habits....5 times daily to keep me in that anabolic mode...same old physical training every morning...same old GG...so what is different?

Thinking hard as I can, I don't think its easy to answer this question...your head tells you one thing and your heart the other...I had an opportunity to hear Sidhu paaji last week (though I am not a very big fan of Sidhusim)...I still remember what he said..Son, in matters where you face a conflict between the pure heart and the head, always trust your heart for the answer...

I shall try and do the same...perhaps, it will ease the pain...

Ohayogozaimasu! (I think thats what they call Good Morning in Japanese)

Thursday, April 1, 2010

Of Generalizations!!!

I am listening to one of my favorite tracks...this one is by Sting called Tomorrow we will see. The lyrics of the song go as under:

The streets are wet
The lights have yet
To shed their darkened luster on the scene

My skirt's too short
My tights are run
These new heels are killing me

A second pack of cigarettes
It's a slow night, but there's time yet
Here comes the john from his other life
He may be driving to his wife
But he slowed down, take a look
I've learned to read them just like books
It's already half past ten
But they'll be back again

Head lights in a rainy street
I checked, made sure it's not the heat
I wink, I smile, I wave my hand
He stops, he seems to understand
A small transaction we must meet
I tell him that my heart will break
If he's not a generous man
I step into his van

They say the first's the hardest trick
But after that it's just a matter of logic
They have the money I have the time
Being pretty's my only crime
Ask what future do I see
I say it's really up to me
I don't need forgiving
I'm just making a living

Don't judge me
You could be me in another life
In another set of circumstances

Don't judge me
One more night
I'll just have to take my chances
For tomorrow we'll see

A friend of mine, he wound up dead
His dress is stained with color red
The next of kin, no fixed abode
Another victim on this road
The police just carted him away
But someone took his place next day
He's home by Thanksgiving
But not with the living

Don't judge me
You could be me in another life
In another set of circumstances

Don't judge me
One more night
I'll just have to take my chances

I know it's just not in my plan
For someone to care who I am

I walk in the streets for money
It's the business of love, hey honey, come on!
Don't leave me lonely, don't leave me sad
I'll be the sweetest five minutes you'll ever have

Don't judge me
You could be me in another life
In another set of circumstances

Don't judge me
One more night
I'll just have to take my chances
And tomorrow we'll see

If you are smart enough, you would have deciphered that this track is a self described thought of a prostitute...she is pointing to what she has been subjected to by the onlookers - ostracized...without having a figment of idea of her circumstances, how crudely she has been judged and categorized as a someone by others around her...

In a lecture of organizational behavior in the MB of A, you would be taught that this is called stereotyping - the pathetic art of classifying people because of certain common attributes they might share with the clan.

Each one of us has been either stereotyped someone else or has been at the receiving end of one in our lifetime...most likely, you would have experienced both...

I will be plainly lying to you if I said that I can't recall any such instances in my lifetime...I believe you would be too if you do deny it...since I can't manage to forget things easily (trust me, its a pain in your ass), I happened to recollect several instances when I was on either side of the see-saw...

Most recently, he has been hinting at me, on several occasions...trying to poke me with some utter garbage about coiffuring (probably because my hair happen to be very long and I am too lazy to keep a clean shave everyday!!!)...I like to retort...and I do...seeking a logic...and then the usual BS about corporate culture is thrown across...my mind fails to process whats being fed...GIGO is what strikes me...Garbage in - Garbage Out - and I shove a theory on stereotyping across to call it evens...that would calm him down for a while...

I rewind even more...and chapter after chapter of similar stuff keeps inundating my thoughts - the interview panel quizzing me about how can you be from sciences and still hope to excel in management...how can you not be an engineer and still survive in this world...how can you be in the top percentile of your class and still play sports for your school...i care a bollocks...

Its not that I haven't stereotyped ever - I have...I remember when I used to dismiss my sibling's thoughts because he is younger and apparently did not know how this world worked and I knew more than him...the time when I thought women couldn't drive and that my mother was the worst driver in the family (yet she is the one who has never had an accident while I keep on smashing our ride)...and many more...

Chuck it...I don't intend you to take away anything from this post...rather its better that you give this time around...leave your sense of judging people by their attributes (be their physique, their background, their culture, their thoughts, etc..etc..etc..)...its hard but the fact remains that what goes around, comes around...

Remember...

1) Don't judge anyone simply on what they appear to be...
2) Don't forget point 1
3) Women are not bad drivers!!!

Adios Amigos!